Mood Swings in the park



I am not sure where this post is going to go so stick with me.

1. I forgot to post over the weekend, I was going to lie and say the 30 days is only week days but that would be bending te truth I know keeping you promises to yourself is important. I am not going to fall on my sword or do a foefiet (spell) I am just going to get on with it.

2. The park. We go to the park a lot, it is where Oli and I connect the best. He climbs on things built for teenagers, chases ducks and runs after dogs.
Some of the best times I had with my Dad were when he' take us to Queen Victoria country park in Southampton.
Too many children in a Rennalt 14 armed with bikes, balls and A Team guns. He liked the river. I liked the Vietnam like undergrowth. 

Today we walked through the park, my head is pounding, I am stupidly anxious about this week. New websites, doing Q & A sessions (which I LOVE especially when I don't have the answer) 
However, my head is pulling me back to bed, telling me everyone will judge me, that the sky is going to fall down and Oliver Cronwell is coming to take me away.

It is not even 9am and I'm fucked.

Then the park.

I walk through the park with #babybernie on my shoulders, we say hi to the ducks, we say hi to everyone. The old men in Turbans with grey Nike sports gear all jogging together, the kind fat lady with the bulldog, the chav in the Burberry cap feeding ducks, the old lady who walks in the park leanng to one side like she expects someone else to be there. I always think she did this walk with her partner who has now died.

I look at the sun, the sky, the people on the out door gym, #babybernie pulls my ears. I look at the way the trees blend together and the squirrels run down trees.

Promt and watchful - I sat through a term of Wordsworth at Roehampton University, I'd never ever read that of my own accord. However, having someone smart lead a discussion on. It makes you watch for things more. Being outside in a green space is so good for your soul and well being. 

My mate Mike says parks are positive places, people come there to play, exercise and hang out. We are always led to believe there is an evil troll or gang in the park. There is not, like Mike suggests there are brilliant, they are brilliant for mood swings in the right direction. 

Really sent from my mobile device so please don't look for typos!